If you’re like me, you want to be liked. The idea of not being liked, or worse being hated, just doesn’t resonate. After all, what’s not to like about you!? That feeling of rejection and judgment is like hell. It’s the worst. Even the THOUGHT of being rejected and judged is like…UGH - please no.
And so, the common thing is to develop a persona that increases the chances of being liked by everyone. However, what we end up doing is sacrificing who we are in favor of being who we think others want us to be.
What we’re looking for is acceptance of some kind. Love of some kind. We’re looking for approval, or some type of positive feedback that we are accepted.
It’s bad.
And if you do this long enough, the idea of being vulnerable is way too much. And worse, you’re no longer in tune with yourself. You’re effectively a shell of yourself. And you can feel it.
You can’t speak your mind. You can’t share who you are. Any sense of true self-expression is locked away, replaced by a long list of rules and guidelines to avoid rejection and seek approval from the entire world.
It’s the ultimate carrot on a stick. There is no such thing as being accepted by everyone. It doesn’t exist.
There will always be at least 1 person that disagrees with your existence. The closer this person is to you, the worse it will feel of course. Irregardless, it’s futile to base our sense of self on the approval of others.
My point is that it’s literally impossible to avoid judgment. Well, I take that back. You can completely abandon your sense of self, and become a yes-man (or woman). You can seek to change yourself moment to moment, in hopes of being likeable by whoever happens to be in front of you. You can try and keep this act up. But, you will get tired. And you can suppress the depression that comes with having to put on an act everyday for as long as you like. But, you can really only do it for so long.
Everyone’s judging you and it doesn’t matter. Let them! You can’t fuckin control them anyways. They’re going to judge you ANYWAYS. It’s happening.
You can be depressed and they’ll still judge you.
You can be absolutely blissed out, and they’ll STILL judge you.
WHAT GIVES?!
Just be you. By effect, those that resonate with your true self will find their way to you. And those that judge you will continue doing so.
Stick close to those that love you for who you really are. They’ll support you. They’ll give you words of encouragement. They’ll understand you at your core.
As for the rest? Let em judge you. You don’t have a say anyways. That’s just what they do.
